Stuff on the brain

1. I hate waiting for the doctor's office to call. It doesn't matter if it's something major ("your pre-cervical cancer state is not advancing") or minor (i.e. "congratulations your cholesterol has not sky-rocketed despite your best efforts"). Both of these situations which I'm currently waiting to hear word on. Because, it appears, that my doctor is incapable of returning calls on her own and needs me to first do an initial reminder call trying to track her down (which never works) and leaving a phone number (which she never tries first). So then I call the next morning, after I've missed a random 6:30pm call to my home phone, to find out that she's not in the office today... after she was gone last week on vacation which she failed to mention in the sentence that started with "I'll call you with the results..." And then I sit with my cell phone on my desk all day, packing it to the bathroom with me, and hoping that's not actually the moment that she calls. In summary: argh.

2. I get so darned excited to do fundraisers and then when it comes down to crunch time, I just want them to be over with. Because they keep me awake at night with dumb things, such as "what am I going to use for centerpieces now that I can't find what I'd planned on?", "is all my help going to show up?", "what if no one comes?" All of which are things that absolutely cannot be solved at 2am when I've let the dog out for the 3rd time.

3. I like my community service stuff. I like helping people. And I'm pretty proud of the fact that I just won the state Moose association female community service volunteer of the year. I'm not looking for recognition for the things that I do, but I'm not necessarily disappointed when a surprise like that shows up.

4. Craft fair. I'm doing my first craft fair on October 16th. It's at the Moose, so I have plenty of concerns that we won't sell all of the tables, although we're doing pretty good, and then I'm worried that we won't have a lot of people come through. I'd love to have people come through, but I'm so excited about the idea of sitting at a table all day, relaxing and sharing space with my mom, hanging out with people that I like, that I don't care too much. I've been a little bit stressed about trying to pull enough items together to have a decent collection to sell, but gosh, being "forced" to craft every night hasn't exactly been painful. And I'm trying not to think at all about whether I'll sell anything. Because that's where my heart starts beating fast... what if no one likes what I made? I hate watching people look over my products, so this is going to be difficult to endur. I'm trying to keep in mind that everyone likes different things, and I like what I made, so someone else probably will to. If not, I have a whole lot of new jewelry. :)

5. Once this week's fundraising shenanigans and the craft fair are over, I'm more than likely going to get sick, but more importantly, I'm going to Cheney the following weekend for Homecoming. Which has become my annual getaway event. There will be no ex's to uncomfortably hang out with this year. Which is good, and bad, because I rarely pay for a drink when he's around. Which is awesome, because he owes me at least that. This year "the fraternity" has other commitments, so it's just going to be the BFF and our other roommate, whom I haven't seen in at least 15 years. Going to be interesting. But it will be relaxing, and I could really use that. And I miss my BFF. I like being around friends that I don't have to say anything to when I want them to glance over at the girl wearing the fluffy white boots in the middle of a redneck college town. For instance.